Put your celebrations rules on one page and send it to families in the first month of school. The page tells families what to bring and what to leave home, and it gives every guide the same answer at pickup.
Decide four things before you write
Settle these with your guides and head of school. Write the decisions as plain sentences, then turn them into the policy.
How you mark birthdays. Many Montessori classrooms hold a walk around the sun, where the child carries a globe around a candle or a sun in the middle of the group, once for each year, while the guide tells a short story of that year. Decide when it happens (during the work cycle, at group time, at the end of the day), how long it lasts, whether families may attend and how many family members can come. Decide what you need from families and by when: a photo from each year, a few sentences about each year, or both.
Which holidays you mark, and how. Some schools mark no holidays in the classroom. Some mark the seasons and a few cultural celebrations through stories, songs and food. Some invite families to share a celebration from their own home. If you invite families to share, say how to sign up and how much time a visit takes.
What food can come in. Check your licensing rules and your current allergy list first. Then decide whether families can bring food at all, whether it must be store-bought with a label, and whether you'd rather the class prepare a snack together.
What stays at home. Name the things you'd rather not see: goody bags, balloons, decorations, invitations handed out in the classroom unless every child gets one, and gifts for the birthday child.
Write the policy in six sections
Keep it under one page. Here is a structure you can adapt, with sample wording in brackets for your own decisions.
- Why we celebrate this way. One or two sentences. "In our classroom, celebrations stay calm and short so the children can return to their work. Each child's birthday is marked with a walk around the sun."
- Birthdays. "We hold the walk around the sun at [time] on or near your child's birthday. Up to [number] family members are welcome. Two weeks before, we'll ask you for one photo from each year of your child's life and a sentence or two about each year. Summer birthdays are celebrated on [your approach, such as a half-birthday or a day in the last month of school]."
- Holidays. "We mark the seasons in the classroom through stories, songs and nature work. Families are welcome to share a celebration from home. To sign up, contact [name] by [method]."
- Food. "Please don't send food for celebrations. The class prepares a simple snack together on birthdays." Or: "If you'd like to send a snack, it must be store-bought, with the ingredient label, and free of [your listed allergens]. Tell the guide [number] days ahead."
- What stays home. "Please keep goody bags, balloons, decorations and gifts for home. Party invitations can go out in the classroom only if every child in the class receives one."
- Questions. The name of one person and how to reach them.
Add two more sentences. Say what happens for children whose families don't celebrate birthdays or certain holidays, and how you'll handle that quietly. Then say what you do for a child whose birthday falls on a weekend, during a break or in the summer.
Send it before the first party
Look up the first birthday on your class list and work back from it. Send the policy at least two weeks before, and include it in your enrollment packet for next year.
Send it on its own, with a subject line families will recognize: "How we celebrate birthdays and holidays." A short cover note helps:
"Before our first birthday of the year, here is how we celebrate in the classroom. It covers birthdays, holidays and food. If your child has a birthday coming up, we'll write to you two weeks ahead with what we need."
Then do what the note says. Two weeks before each birthday, send that family a short message with the date, the time and the photo request. Keep a copy of the message to reuse.
Use it the same way every time
Give a copy to your assistants and your front desk staff. Practice the answer to a parent who asks to bring a homemade treat:
"Thank you for thinking of the class. Our policy is no food from home for celebrations, because of allergies. We'll make a snack together on the day, and your child can help choose it."
If a family brings something anyway, accept it politely and send it home at pickup. Speak to the family privately later, and point them back to the page.
Review the policy once a year, after you've heard the year's questions. Add anything you had to explain more than twice.